I could go on and on about the amazingly beautiful souls that have touched my heart in the last 4 months. We are truly blessed to be among such loving and supportive people and we are so lucky to have had such a strong support system in place before we lost Holden. Each kind word, kind gesture and hug has given us little bits of strength to move forward. Such a blessing among such sadness.
From day one, the support we received was amazing. For the first month and a half, we received meals almost daily. I am now convinced that southwestern Wisconsin is home to the best cooks in the world. We received countless cards, gifts and money. We never asked for anything and yet our community took it upon themselves to shower us with love. In the first few weeks, our raw emotions were at the forefront and we were just trying to figure it all out. It is in those moments where the support we received kept us afloat and allowed us to come out stronger that we would have been without it. I grew up in this community and know the amazing power it possesses but I now know the true meaning behind it. It is a community where you will never face your battles alone. There will always be someone there to stand beside you and fight. Growing up, I knew someone on every block, someone I could trust. It is an amazing feeling to know that my own children are being raised within this community.
I think that sometimes the negativity that always seeps into our lives overshadows the good. We become blind to the blessings and goodness that surrounds us. I am guilty of this but since Holden's birth, I have seen the beauty of human nature and am reminded of the amazing power of our community. I have seen people shed tears for us, grieve their own losses, reach out to lend a hand and even just extend a simple "I'm sorry". A loss such as ours is not how life is intended to be. Death before birth is such a unfathomable cycle. For many years, such losses were kept secret or talked about minimally. I feel that it is my job to honor my boys by changing the stigma, shatter the silence. Silence is the loudest, most deafening sound after the loss of a baby and I have been blessed to be able to speak openly and be so lovingly embraced by our community. Bill has also been able to speak openly although he will probably tell you I do most of the talking :)
Even my precious girls have been given the opportunity to speak openly which is so healing for them. They are grieving, too. I approached each of their teachers before school started and explained that they will most likely talk about their brothers. We have been given nothing but unwavering support. Bryn has been given a journal to write in at school so she does not have to bring her home journal to school and chance losing it. It is those little gestures that mean so much, that help us get through each day.
The beauty of our community is unmatched. We were blessed before but see it more clearly now. Each person we have encountered has given us the gift of their love. There are not many places I this world where people will open their hearts so willingly. I don't mean to sound preachy but I hope my words can let you all see what we have witnessed: the absolute beauty of this community and the amazing souls within it. Many, many thanks for everything. Your kindness carries us through on our toughest days ♡
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